Hope you’re sitting down, well you’re on a computer so you probably are. Unless you’re on your phone, and at least then you aren’t driving. I know hearing from me is a shock. Remembering my log in details – shock 2. Anyway, moving on. And sorry for the length of the post. Inblogappropriate.
I’ve come to a few realisations this week, and accompanying that a renewed enthusiasm. I hadn’t been able to figure out why I’d lost the passion for my novel. The story’s still really great, and of course the writing, in my conservative opinion, still has flashes of brilliance. So what was the problem.
I identified about 3,000 words ago that the alternating first person voices I’ve been using need to change, one can remain pretty much as is – the other needs to change to third person. I’ve also realised that my attempt to make these two friends hasn’t worked, and is unlikely to be necessary. So there’s some fantastic drunken scenes that will have to go (bang, dead darling), they’ll need to be acquaintance maybe an early foray into friendship and then a gradual drifting.
I also had a planned ending, as I really struggle with endings, and I also realised I wrote in a scene that actually contradicts it about halfway through.
What I’m saying is that there is some serious editing required – serious editing. But I figured I was about 2/3rds through, I should persevere to the end, finish the manuscript and have something complete to fix.
But then I stopped – I assume I resented writing what would become redundant words. I’m all for writing exercises, writing apart from your manuscript, that’s great, fun, skill building. But while I procrastinated against finishing my manuscript I felt guilty about other writing. Like I was cheating on my manuscript.
So I stopped.
And I felt guilty about it.
So I avoided.
But you know what. I’ve faced it. I need to start it again. I want to start again. And you know what, I need to write again.
So here I am – step 1, revive the blog.
Cos I received a sign – funny.
Since starting my own blog I’ve been following Kate McClafferty (soon to be Glodney) – and if any of you are still there, reading, waiting ever so patiently for me to reappear, get over there, read her and enjoy, thank me later.
But yesterday, I was juggling my phone, turning on the blue tooth speaker to Spotify while cooking and I accidentally pocket email replied to her RSS feed. A blank email. And you know what, just a few minutes later I received an email notification that she liked one of my posts. On my blog that has been inactive forever. And on the same day I finally admitted I need to write again.
So thanks Kate – for the inadvertent sign you sent me.
And if any of you are there – welcome back, I’m happy to be here.